F-Zero: 16-Bit Warrior... With A Vengeance!

Hello internet! It's been... Months! The craziness of life is just too damn much sometimes, y'know? I don't want to do a lengthy excuse of my absence, or any of that jazz; just know that I will do my best to be back on this here blog at least once a week! If not more. If any of you gamers are still lookin' at us, I hope you'll continue along for the ride and tell your friends to come check us out with saying "And they'll actually keep blogging! For reals!"

But you don't need to say 'For reals'... Cuz I don't think people actually say that... ANYWAY!

So when we left off I was going to go into a cry-fest of how badly I failed at the next couple of tracks in F-Zero. However, I completely forgot the woes I had endured, and so we will pick up where we left off with a new fresh impression. 

I did exceptionally well I thought at tackling the first two levels again; Mute City and Big Blue. I would say my experiences were largely the same (with the exception that I wasn't surprised by things.) Next we came to the Sand Ocean.

Sand Ocean taught me about corners. I remember why I hated it so much. There are these thin parts where you have pull tight curves. You have to release the acceleration, turn AND use the drift (L or R.) It is stressful, but when you make one of the tight turns without hitting a wall or another car it is SO satisfying. That's another thing that this game has going for it. It makes you feel good for when you succeed; because it's all about skill. You have to develop your skill at maneuvering these flying cars through these hazardous race tracks. Of course, I did not get through this course unscathed. I smashed walls, bounced off of others cars, went careening in directions for reasons I can only assume were momentum... But I came out on top! 

 I spent the entirety of that course in 3rd or 4th, but on the second last lap I got into a groove and pulled ahead to take victory. Just barely as you can see above. I remember when I raced this track those months ago I died twice. I have clearly improved by 'sitting on it' as they say.

The next track was aptly named Death Wind I. This track was frustrating as hell because if you look at the map - it looks incredibly straight forward. It's even more basic than Mute City! What makes this track difficult is the- wait for it- wind! On the long stretches of track the wind is constantly blowing you towards one of the walls. You have to constantly be drifting against it. Also, there are speed boosts (anyone who is familar with Mario Cart knows that drill - glowing arrow, zoom zoom.) But here's the kicker: if you hit a speed boost and you're drifting, you'll go FLYING into the direction you're drifting, and smash into a wall. Now, you may thing "Well, just don't hit the speed boost.' WRONG. Because every goddamn other car hits that speed boost, and you appear to be the only one whose car is being battered by wind. So if you miss a boost, you will be passed.

I spent the majority of this course in the lead. I had gotten the hang of the driving, and I clearly had figured out my problems from before. I knew where to drift, I knew which patches of gravel to avoid (all of them) and I knew how to turn well. But somehow I bumped something on the last lap, last corner, and got passed. By two cars. Brutal. So mad. Not pleased. Moving on.

Silence. This track should be called "How many right angles can we fit on a racing course?" Apparently it's quite a few. I wouldn't really have imagined racing on a track with square corners, why would you? That just seems like poor design, and dangerous, and stupid.

 Nonetheless, here we were, racing along some terribly sharp corners. Of course these weren't the only obstacle. There was also a HUGE gravel section that had to be leapt over. There is a small blue bar that launches you over it all if you've picked up enough speed. You may also notice that there is a section that you can turn off to at the top of the track; DON'T. It's a lie. It's a trap. Whatever you want to call it. If you go down it, you won't be able to turn and have enough speed to make it over the gravel pit and whatever time you saved will be lost. I did not do that on this run... I remember making that mistake before. What I DID do this run was pretty stupid. I missed the jump. I did not drift over far enough and I drove all the way over the gravel which slowed me all the way down and I was passed by two cars... Again. So I came in third after spending the majority of the game in the lead. No luck for this guy, I tell ya.

This isn't a screenshot of my original race, I took it in practice so you guys could see the map.

I cursed my folley and grumbled as the race finished. The game then recounted for me the stats of the past 5 races: so here we are.

 Mute City

Big Blue

Sand Ocean

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Death Wind I

Silence

Not too terrible, apart from bombing the end of the last two courses... But I completed the Knight League. I'm not 100% happy with my performance, so I MAY redo it to get 1st on all the courses... But my next mission is to tackle Queen League, so get ready for some more high velocity action!

Catch ya later gamers.

P.S. Man it is nice to be back; it's a great feeling playing these old games. Thank you to everyone who kept popping in and looking at our blog even while we were away, hopefully we can keep you coming!